A friend of mine has not had a good time of it lately. Two years ago, his wife died. He runs a number of charity foundations which have recently struggled to stay active and he has his own health problems.
Anyway, he’s managed to get together with a splendid young lady who seems to make him refreshingly happy. Trouble is, as she’s such a fine specimen, I’m rather keen to have a go at her myself. I’ve already made attempts to seduce the woman, and in my experience it doesn’t take too long. Would it be unacceptable to carry on and have my way with the filly?
Mz. Diamond Princess, whilst I thank you most humbly for taking the time to answer my question, I must say that you have quite possibly the very worst use of language I have ever observed.
I’m afraid I can’t understand you.

A very good friend of mine has not had a good time of it lately. Two years ago his wife died, he runs a number of charity foundations, which have recently struggled to stay active, and has his own health problems. Anyway, he’s managed to get together with a splendid young lady, who seems to make him happy. Trouble is, as she’s such a fine specimen , I’m rather keen to have a go at her myself. I’ve already made attempts to seduce the woman, and in my experience it doesn’t take to long. Would it be frowned upon if I continued and had my way with the filly?

Dear Sir/Madam

This is to notify you that you have been chosen By the Board of
trustees
of the above International charity organization branched in the
Netherlands as one of the final recipients of a Cash Grant/Donation for
your own personal, education and business development.
Based on the random selection exercise of internet service providers
(ISP)
and millions of Super market cash invoices worldwide, you were selected
among the lucky recipients to receive the award sum of US,000,000.00
(TWO Million United States Dollars) as charity donations/aid from the
Association Of European Charity Foundations and the UNO in accordance
with
the enabling act of Parliament. Note that, your email was selected from
either the internet, or a Shop’s cash invoice around your area in which
you might have purchased something from.

You are required to expeditiously Contact the Executive Secretary below
for qualification documentation and processing of your claims, from
Monday
through Sunday.

On contact with this officer, you’ll be given your donation pin number
which you will use in collecting the funds.

Please endeavor to quote your Qualification numbers (N-121-6537,
G-001-06)
in all discussions.

***********************************
Executive Secretary,
Mr. Robert Bloom
Tel:+31-626-415-837
Fax:+318 474 54671.
Email:remitancedept003@yahoo.com.hk
**********************************

Please note that this donation/Grant is strictly administered by
"European
Union" under delegated powers from the UNO. You are hereby advised to
keep
this whole information confidential until you have been able to collect
your donation, as there have been many cases of double and unqualified
claim, due to beneficiaries informing third parties about his/her
donation.

Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. susan wallace
(Foundation officer)